Some presidents gave speeches.
Some hunted moose.

Teddy Rip ’N’ Tear did all that — and then showed up to snack time like it was a battlefield, a bar fight, and a cookout all at once.
Introducing COLONEL TEDDY RIP ’N’ TEAR — the rough-riding, cigar-chomping, antler-wearing commander of Freedom Flavors who doesn’t “eat jerky.”
He handles problems with it.
Look at him: shirtless confidence, tactical belt, the Freedom Flavors sash like he won an election by knockout, and two slabs of meat in his hands like they’re approved melee weapons.
This isn’t a shirt.
It’s a warning label for anyone still out here eating bland snacks like it’s acceptable behavior.
 
What this design says without saying it:
“Yes, I’m in charge of the cookout.”
“No, you can’t have a piece.”
“If your jerky is weak, I will stare at you until you feel shame.”
And that title? RIP ’N’ TEAR.
Because Teddy doesn’t do “light snacking.”
He does full-send chewing with a side of chaos.
 
This tee is for:
Vets and patriots who like their humor a little reckless
Gym rats who treat protein like a constitutional right
People who chew loud, live loud, and bring snacks like it’s mission-essential
Anyone who wants strangers to laugh, nod, and ask “Where did you get that?” in the same breath
 
Wearing this shirt may cause:
✅ Your buddies calling you “Colonel” immediately
✅ Strangers reading “RIP ’N’ TEAR” out loud and losing composure
✅ You becoming the unofficial snack supplier at every event
✅ A sudden urge to stand like a statue and chew like you mean it
Freedom Flavors — THE TASTE OF FREEDOM.
Wear the legend. Start the chaos.